18 06 2011

The whole answer to raising great children is the discipline that you do as a parent.  Now, this is not hard to do.  Just say what you mean and mean what you say!  That’s really all there  is to it.  Then the children respect what you say and will mind and also will appreciate that you did this for them when they were growing up.

One lady I know argues with her children all the time.  She tells them what to do and then they start arguing and they keep that up until she gives up.  They have won and do not know it, of course, but they actually have lost.   Because they now have a way of life stretching before them where they argue all the time over every little thing.  What a waste.  And they may never figure out why their life and the lives of those nearest and dearest to them is a shambles.  Arguing does that to a person.

If you want your son to carry out the garbage, just ask him nicely to do it.  If he complains or argues about it, repeat your request one more time and then do not talk about it anymore.  He will soon get the idea and carry out the garbage.  It is not necessary to ruin your day nor his by becoming upset.  You have stated your request.  He will do it.  I taught kindergarten for awhile and learned there that if a child balked about something, the teacher just simply said, ‘you will do this’ and the child did.  Simple, almost too simple to believe.

No need for trouble, no need for arguing, no need for upsets over simple things in life.  Your child will soon learn that in order to have a happy life, he needs to mind.  And he will.  And he will also respect you for that.  If there is need for more discipline, then have a set routine for that.  Of course that always depends upon the age of the child.  Some of my children still laugh about the fact they spent a lot of time while teens playing basketball on the driveway because they were grounded for one reason or another.  It worked though.

When they were younger, there were simple things like denying a treat or a favor.  Later on, it was the denial of telephone privileges.  Just do what works best for you.  But the most important thing is to say what you mean and mean what you say.   And then do not ever argue the point.  End of subject.

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