22 03 2011

When I was a young person, I always thought it would be nice to be ‘somebody.’  However, I never figured out who that ‘somebody’ was.  I went to all the nice parties and did all the right things, but never felt like I was really ‘somebody’.  So I finally decided that wasn’t the ‘somebody’ I wanted to be anyway.    I was happier just being me.

After I was married and had small children, I would see all the ‘somebody’ ladies going to lunch with their silk blouses on and their flashy rings.  This was it!  I could be one of them.  Only I couldn’t.  I didn’t have the money for lunch and I didn’t own a silk blouse and had no flashy rings either.  So that must not be the ‘somebody’ I want to be.

Later on, I had more money, a nice car and my children were in school.  Now I could be ‘somebody’.  But – couldn’t do that after all.   I was too busy driving carpools and shopping and cooking and cleaning and washing and ironing.  Couldn’t be ‘somebody’ doing all that.  Never did get that silk blouse either.  If I had it, I probably couldn’t have found it during those years.

Then, when all my children were grown, I knew I could be ‘somebody’ now.  I had the time, the lunch money, the silk blouse, and I was just sure this was the time in my life to be ‘somebody’.  Only it wasn’t.  I really didn’t want to be that ‘somebody’ anymore.  I had found there were better things to be in this life.

Now, I only want to be pleasing to God in whatever it is that I do each day.  Couldn’t care less for the silk blouse or the flashy rings or the perfect house or the ‘somebody place’ in social life.  I still just want to be me.  I am very happy with me and my relationship with God.  For that, I am most grateful.  Thank You, Dear God.  And Thank You for not letting me be ‘somebody’ ever.